Recognizing Difficulties

Recently a friend was over and he commented about how effective my wife and I were when it came to parenting. The comment was borne out of an approach my wife and I have attempted to take with our son. He is very intelligent and we recognize that and praise him for it. He is a wiz at certain subject. There are, however, other areas where he may not be as quick as his peers. We have never pushed him. He gets encouragement but not overbearing behavior.

In addition, this is a child that has some issues. He is a loving, caring individual but when he gets over stimulated, he can get slightly aggressive towards his parents. We have talked with doctors about this. He sees a psychologist periodically and some behavioral issues are controlled by medication.

I would not suggest that this is the approach for everyone to take. Different people respond differently. Still, we all probably know those parents who close their eyes to a situation and pretend it does not exist. That does not do anyone any favors. It does nothing to help the child, it does nothing to help the parents and it could possibly make it more difficult for teachers and the school system.

Certainly a child is responsible for his/her own actions but a parent has got to be involved and assess things honestly. By doing so you help prepare the child for school, for college, for a job, for life. And, after all, isn’t that the role of the parent?

Sometimes doctors can be wrong. Obviously, the parent knows the child better than anyone else and sometimes doctors need to be challenged. I would say the same thing, by the way, about teachers.

As I see it, recognizing the talents and difficulties of children, seeking the proper treatment (which can be anything from parent involvement to heavy duty medication), monitoring progress and effectives of treatment, is all part of preparing a child for college. And college should be a way of helping to prepare a child for life.